We had a baby shower for a friend who is having her first baby this past weekend, and I was reminded of how God blessed me with each of the three children I have and of the one who went to heaven even before she entered this world.
It’s been more than seven years and even now there’s a longing in my heart to know this child. I know that someday we will meet her. I know she’s a little girl because my Heavenly Father in His kindness let me hear her laughter, the moment she left this world and went to be with him.
That morning, I had begun bleeding and had gone to see the gynecologist, who ordered bed rest. I came home and took a nap, while my husband took the girls out. And all of a sudden, I awoke to the sweet laughter of children and at first, I thought it was my girls but they were not home yet.
It was a weekday and most everyone from our small village was at work or school. I went to the window to look out and see if there might be children and there was no one. And that’s when I “saw“ a group of children playing and she was among them.
Later that day, when I eventually went to the hospital, her body came out and I knew she was gone.
And even though I knew she was in heaven in the arms of Jesus, my heart ached with sorrow and I couldn’t shake the sadness for months. It was so hard to let go.
I couldn’t face the thought of getting pregnant and losing another child and so I stayed away from my husband. But God is a kind Father. I knew I had to let go and trust Him. And when I did five months later, I became pregnant with my little Robbie.
My heart was comforted. The little baby brother the girls had prayed for finally arrived and our hearts were filled with joy.
Last week, I took Robbie to register him for first grade. He is the quiet one in the family and while he wasn’t so keen on reciting his poem for the teacher, he passed the written part with flying colors.
I don’t always understand God’s way but I know I can trust Him. I see my son who is quickly growing up and I see God’s kindness and goodness to me. And someday, I’m going to have the joy of meeting my little girl.